I grew up a Tom Boy because there were more boys than girls to play with in my neighborhood. I was one of the boys until around age 10, when I figured out why I was suddenly the only one getting tackled when we played football (here's a clue - this popularity coincided with my first bra). As a recovering Tom Boy I never expected to be so excited by cute girlie girl stuff, especially bows and cute hair. Something about having a baby girl changed me.

Cute hair can be difficult to achieve when you have a girl whose major area of tactile defensiveness is her head. Washing and brushing hair can be a challenge, and most days doing anything extra is impossible. We've made some changes to Clara-Bear's sensory diet recently and she tolerating having her head touched, so I decided to attempt heart pigtails, to honor both Valentine's Day and the special fun that comes with having a little girl.

I've been following the blog Adopt a 'Do - Cute Girls Hairstyles. This Mommy Blogger brings her love of her children, cute girls hair, and adoption together in a really sweet and inspiring way. She has a daughter with hair about the same length as Clara-Bear's, otherwise I probably wouldn't bother following her blog. Longer hair needs more brushing, so I don't know if Clara-Bear will ever be able to grow her hair out. I have to cut her hair while we're homebound this winter, so not only is it short, it's uneven. Clara-Bear keeps her head down because of poor trunk control and ASD, and this becomes worse when I try to work with her hair. It's difficult to keep a part because her hair is trained to fall forward due to her posture, and I never know what way she is going to move. So, when I first saw the Heart Pigtails on Adopt a 'Do I yearned for them but didn't think they would work for us. But, like I said, we've made some changes to her sensory diet and she has not fought having her hair brushed for two days. So I dove in, and look what we have!


This "5 minute" 'do took me over 20 minutes! We watched the video tutorial together, and other than the usual problems with posture and moving around, Clara-Bear did great! She just played without seeming to care that I was fiddling with her hair.

It's not just Clara-Bear's sensory issues that interfere with cute girlie-girl hair. There was a 3 year old boy in her summer program who could be aggressive. He started pulling Clara-Bear's hair every day (don't ask me how, he had a one-on-one). I finally figured out that he was drawn to her hair bows and sparkly clips. So my Pretty Prettiest Princess had to go to school without hair bling and the daily pulling turned to daily hugs (don't ask me how, he still had a one-on-one). Even though the plan is for her to be in inclusive classrooms there is a possibility that she might still be vulnerable to this type of attention as she moves through school. But who cares about that right now? Clara-Bear is dancing in the kitchen with super-cute hair!

My Mother's heart lives for moments like this. Not only am I experiencing a rare mother-daughter moment; I feel like I'm getting a glimpse of our future. Of a time when I understand how to work with Clara-Bear's complicated mix of physical and sensory issues and can teach her how to understand herself. Of a time when she can communicate with me, and finally tell me what experiences she wants to share with Mommy. I heart having a little girl!